An Introvert's Perspective: The Surprising Benefits of Small Talk

I recently stumbled upon an insightful video on YouTube titled How to Get Good at Small Talk, and Even Enjoy It - YouTube The video highlights several key points about the importance of small talk in our daily lives:

1. Small talk is more than just chit-chat; it is a way to connect and bond with others.
2. The focus of small talk should be on being interested in others rather than trying to be interesting or performing well. Mistakes are common in communication, and that's okay.
3. There's no need to rush when responding. It's perfectly acceptable to pause and paraphrase what the other person said.

Reflecting on my own experiences, I realized there are a few reasons why I have not always enjoyed small talk:

1. I often find it challenging to be interested in the topics being discussed, such as the latest Netflix series, celebrity gossip, upcoming local events, or delicious foods someone tried over the weekend. However, I've come to understand that the purpose of small talk is not just about the topics themselves but also about the connection and bonding built through these casual conversations.
2. I tend to be careful with my words and worry about making the wrong comments, which leads me to take more time to process and select what I say. Sometimes, I resort to staying silent because I'm not particularly interested in the conversation. However, I've learned that I don't need to provide my opinions in every conversation. Instead, I can say something general to keep the conversation flowing, as the primary goal is to build relationships rather than engage in deep discussions.
3. I prefer deep and meaningful conversations on matters that are significant to society, such as science, social issues, and businesses. I've found it challenging to have such conversations in casual settings. However, I've discovered that there are more people willing to discuss these issues than I initially thought. That being said, a normal conversation rarely starts with these heavy topics. Small talk is a way to break the ice and potentially lead to deeper conversations.

After years of focusing on developing my hard skills, I now realize that it's time for me to work on my soft skills as well. The first skill I aim to strengthen is my ability to connect and build relationships with others.